Queen For a Day

I've been tagged by Melissa at Fischtale Designs to write a list of 5 quirky facts about myself. I have done this a few times before, but since my life is pretty much one giant "quirk" (which probably makes me the Queen of Quirk), I'll give it another go. Here are 5 snippets from the "Land of Quirk", and some of these even qualify as Blasts From the Past, my regularly random series of fond memories of child rearing.

Number 1-- "A Pox on you"

My youngest kid was given the chicken pox vaccine as a baby but came down with The Pox a few years later anyway. I had no idea she could still get the virus so I thought it was just a rash and sent her to school. This was 14 days before Christmas--(yes folks, that is precisely the incubation period for coming down with the illness after exposure.) I never told anyone it was us that spread Chicken Pox. . . er. . .the Christmas Cheer to the entire kindergarten. And if anyone I know asks, I'll just deny the whole thing.

Number 2--"Barfy Artist Disease"

[In honor of one of my fellow blog-sisters, Cindy over at Yapping Cat, as she discussed recently the hazards of crafting and fingers and X-acto knives.]
I guess it's an occupational hazard. (Just look at Van Gogh--his missing ear was most likely a huge misunderstanding and probably involved a miscue with an X-acto.) I've had the same war wound on my left index finger. And then there is the "Dropped the X-acto that Lands Straight into Foot" injury. Followed by the "Too Queasy to Pull it Out Syndrome". Which, if not addressed quickly, will lapse into a condition known as the dreaded "Fainting Artist Disease". Cindy responds, "Yes, if I had had to "retrieve" the knife from being impaled in my finger...the "Barfy Artist" disease would reign..." I hear ya, sistah.

Number 3-- "Julia Childs would run for the hills"

There are pieces of boiled eggs which exploded all over my 10 foot kitchen ceiling. The mess was indescribable, and the smell. . . oh, the smell. . . I'm shuddering as I think of it. One day I will give all the gory and smelly details--but that's another post for another day.

Number 4-- "Potty Training is overrated--I like to call it "Survival of the Fittest."

By the time we got to the job of potty training the 4th kid, with the busy schedules of her 3 older siblings I really found it easier just to use diapers. We spent so many days at ball fields and car lines and grocery stores and practices and other places with limited facilities, I had to find a way to survive. You moms know the drill-- the entire world must stop when your 2 year old has to "go". And I'm not even going to mention the less-than-sanitary conditions of public restrooms--or frantically trying to cover the toilet seat with t.p. before the "waterworks" begin. . . or worse, trying to dangle a 2 year old over the noxious surface when urgency trumps germ-a-phobia. In those days before Purell, echoes of my own childhood came crashing back as I found myself repeating these same words my own dear mother had spoken an eon before, "Don't TOUCH ANYTHING!!" I am probably the only mom on the planet who said to her little one, "Oh, honey, wouldn't you just like to wear a diaper today?"

Number 5-- "Return to Sender"
I celebrated my birthday this month. I am thankful for each day and the wonderful possibility therein, but the scary part is that I'm inching toward 50, so AARP is right around the corner. I'm thinking about moving to a different corner, and not leaving a forwarding address.

(If you're up to it you can read the other lists I've done here and here and here.)